Friday, 14 May 2010

I'll never need more than this..

I wanted to extend this post as it's something really on my heart at the moment. I tend to live my life in the future, desires I have, things I want to achieve. While its good to have goals and aspirations, they can be destructive in equal measure. The quote from my last post expresses this beautifully:

'They'd dusk dream in silence. together but not.
Because his views were clouded by some very rainy yesterdays
and hers were all sunshine tomorrows.
I wish they could have just seen today'

I am definitely a sunshine tomorrows kind of girl! But recently Gods been showing me that I have everything I need. He provides for me in every circumstance:

"But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus." Phillipians 4:19

Recently he's been whispering this to me - and I realise how richly I am provided for, in all sorts of expected and unexpected ways. Not just fiscally but emotionally. He has given me people to look after me, to be brothers and sisters. Friends who consistently speak words over my life which I didn't even realize how badly I needed to hear until they've been said, who stand with me equally in pain and Joy.

and yet despite his constant provision often I am discontented, I whine and wonder why I haven't been given all that I desire. I don't want this to be the case anymore. As Oswald Chambers says (man I love this guy, he pulls no punches!!)

'May God not find complaints in us anymore, but spiritual vitality—a readiness to face anything He brings our way. The only proper goal of life is that we manifest the Son of God; and when this occurs, all of our dictating of our demands to God disappears. Our Lord never dictated demands to His Father, and neither are we to make demands on God. We are here to submit to His will so that He may work through us what He wants.' My Utmost for His Highest.

and I'm learning that there's such joy to be had in this submission of will. I haven't been cheated out of my hearts desires, nor have they disappeared. I'm just learning to be content in the vast riches he has already lavished upon me!

and so! This verse from an old hymn grows in significance daily :)

'I take o cross thy shadow, for my abiding place;
I ask no other sunshine than the sunshine of his face,
content to let this world go by,
to know no more of gain nor loss
my sinful self my only shame
my glory all the cross.'

Elizabeth Clephane

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